Thursday, August 13, 2009

Top Ten Reasons Why I Cannot Get My Homework Done on Time

I teach junior high and high school students, so I know about excuses. “The dog ate my homework” has morphed into “My printer blew up,” but the kinds of excuses and their frequency are pretty consistent over the years. I started a graduate program in theology this summer, and now I am the one keeping up with homework. With my summer schedule, I should be able to manage. I am a good reader and writer, and I am interested in the topics at hand. So why oh why am I behind? I have three more papers to write for the class I finished two weeks ago, and I just now finished my reading for yesterday’s class period. I have yet to begin the reading due today, let alone what I should have done before tomorrow’s class period. So here is my list of excuses, and I swear every single excuse is true.

10. I am interested in everything, so when I am reading my digital library sources, I click on every red, green, brown, or blue word that leads to a link that explains everything. This essentially doubles or triples my reading time.

9. I got the wrong copy of the course outline and ordered the wrong book.

8. I got the wrong copy of the course outline which did not include any of the pre-class assignments on it, including “Begin a careful reading of Acts to Revelation” and “Read as much of Dunn’s [2000 page book] . . . as possible.”

7. I had to go to my own 50th birthday party.

6. I live in an 850 square foot condo, and when my daughter or husband have the television on, there is nowhere to flee from its presence—and between the two of them, it is always on.

5. I ordered a book from an Amazon seller, and they accidentally sent it to the wrong person.

4. One word: Facebook

3. Some of my extended family has been visiting from out of town.

2. Three words: America’s Got Talent

And the number one reason I cannot get my homework done on time: I started a blog.

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